Monday, November 3, 2014

Blog Tour: Excerpt, Review, and Giveaway of The Morbid and Sultry Tales of Genevieve Clare by J.B. Hartnett

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The Morbid and Sultry Tales of Genevieve Clare is LIVE! Meet Genevieve and Ahren in this dark and sultry tale of love loss! I can't wait for you to read the excerpt and my thoughts on this amazing book!

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My name is Genevieve Clare, professional mourner, destined to spend my days 

donning a black suit and throwing myself on top of caskets for money. Sometimes I mixed 

it up and threw myself on top of a willing warm body instead. Finding the right warm body 

though, that was a different story.

Barnes & Noble:

Release Date: October 30th

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I approached Bryce Oskin, with caution, and when I reached his side, he demanded, “Who the fuck are you?”
Charm and disarm. Charm and disarm.
“I’m Genevieve Clare, Mr. Oskin,” I said with a grin. “I believe you hired me to come to your funeral? Mind if I join you?” I brought my own bag of goodies and opened a white baker’s box from Brewster’s.
“You some kind of spooky chick?” he asked, his eyes squinting as he studied me.
If I didn’t know any better, I’d think he was… sweet on me already. “Kinda, yeah. If by spooky you mean I get paid to go to funerals, give people a nudge, and check for a heartbeat. Oh, and I live at Eden Hills. Then yeah, I’m spooky.” I grabbed a plastic fork and took a bite of amazing cake. It was always amazing, but today it seemed more amazing than usual.
“There,” I nodded toward the folder I’d set down on a little table to his side. “I just need you to sign on the dotted line. And the bag there is from Ruby. But I’m taking over the goody-bag duties, so tell me what you like and I’ll get it for you.” I licked my lips and did it seductively because I knew this was a man who appreciated a woman. Also known as a dirty old man. “Want a bite?”
“You gonna tell that Nazi Nurse Ratchet on me?” He jerked his head toward Cheryl.
“Are you gonna drop dead from half a slice of cake?” I countered.
“Then I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship, Mr. Oskin. I visit once a week, unless I have a funeral, usually on Tuesday or Wednesday. I always bring cake for my clients. If there’s something you don’t like, just tell me. But I usually bring a selection.”
“You do this every week?” he asked, disbelief in his voice.
“What do you mean?”
“You eat like that every week? When you see other clients?” His eyes slid up and down the length of my body.
“I have a high metabolism.” I smiled. It really was a miracle I wasn’t as big as a house. But my sweet tooth was limited to sharing with clients. I had to give myself some sort of boundaries.
He grabbed the plastic fork I’d handed him and stabbed the slice of Meyer lemon cake with vanilla bean cream cheese frosting. His eyes closed, and when they opened, he said, “God bless you.” After a few more bites, he asked, “So, you’re gonna open up my box and poke me before they burn me, right?”
“Yes, sir, I’ll make sure you’re good and dead.”
“Spooky chick.” His tone was gruff, but his lip tipped up in the corner.
I saw it with pride. Disarmament, accomplished.
Bryce Oskin had ordered the Shake N Bake. I had permission from most of the mortuaries and crematories to open the casket and check the body. I mean, you could just tell when someone was dead. By the time I had my turn with the deceased, they were most likely already embalmed. But some of them chose not to be, or if they were, they hired me to come to their place of death and make damn sure there was no chance in hell they were coming back to life.
A while back, there was a highly publicized case in Southern California. A woman had been pronounced dead and taken to the hospital morgue. But when they opened the fridge for her to be transported to the funeral home, they saw obvious signs of a struggle. She’d been put in there alive.
I’d never been afraid of death, and, after my family died and the man I loved almost had, I embraced death in my own strange way. I made it my life’s work, I guess. While it took a lot to creep me out, that story gave me the heebie-jeebies something fierce. It was all over the news. Every staff member from the hospital to the morgue was investigated then sued or fired or both. And, of course, old people sitting in the common room of a rest home from the wee a.m. hours to beddy-bye time, saw that story six times in one day, minimum. I ended up receiving so many requests to make sure they weren’t breathing, I added the Shake N Bake to my website.

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★★★★★ stars

I knew this book was going to be interesting, but I had no idea I was going to love it so much.  I thought the story was going to be all about death and gloomy, but instead it was emotional, uplifting, and funny.  That's right, I said funny.  I laughed as much as I cried while reading this book, which is a very good thing. I love it when I emotionally connect with the characters, it enhances the reading experience and makes it richer.  

I absolutely loved Genevieve and Ahren. I mean not only were those two perfect for each other, but they were just really nice people.  My heart hurt so much for them though; they'd had to deal with so much. I loved Gen's big heart, and willingness to help those she loved and cared for.  I loved how decisive Ahren was and also how caring too.  I loved seeing Gen with her best friend Rocky and how they supported one another.  

Another part I absolutely loved was all the cake in the book.  I would love to get my hands on some of those recipes, especially some of the cakes using during a tasting.  In particular a wedding cake.  My mouth was watering every time cake was mentioned.  Another favorite part of mine had to do with how everything tied back into Ahren, Gen, and their families.  Especially the "oldies".  I take that back, I didn't like them, I loved them, especially for the wisdom they gave Gen and Ahren.  

I really feel like the message this book has to give is a beautiful and positive one that sort of gets lost in the blurb.  I don't think it does the story an iota of justice.  This book was certainly worth the sleep I lost because I couldn't put the book down.  I love J.B. Hartnett for writing something new and daring. It's certainly refreshing and unlike anything I can recall reading. It's my first book by her and it's set the bar really high for any that will follow.  

*Thank you to the author for providing a copy in exchange for an honest review.  All opinions are my own and I was not compensated for them in any manner.* 

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Teaser Quotes

- With Tony, it seemed to take a lot to get me going. When Ahren walked into a room, I wanted to smother him with my vagina.

- "We’re all gonna die, Cookie. Death is the devil you know. The better you live, the more you piss him off, and he just hates that. Right now, you’re lettin’ him get his way.”
- So when I looked at him in the truck, I saw this man I’d loved for years. This time, instead of looking at him with the eyes of a silly girl, an awkward teen, a romantic young woman, or a grieving daughter…this time, I looked at him with the eyes of a woman in love. A woman who knew her heart, finally, and I knew, in that moment, nothing would ever part us again.

- Now, seeing all of him, I fell a little more in love that day because, in my mind, he’d always been perfection. But no one is perfect, not in the real world. His fragility made him so in my eyes.

- “I’ve decided it’s worth the risk of losing you and having you for one day, than never having you at all.”

About the Author
j.b. hartnett.jpgJulie is a Southern California native, a fan of a really good story (preferably romance with a happily ever after), really good pie (preferably pumpkin) and copious amounts of coffee (preferably Folgers).
She has always enjoyed writing and at one time thought she could be a singer songwriter...the 'writer' part is the one that stuck.
Julie is obsessed with pi...the equation(and the food). She's allergic to cats and cantaloupe and hates if you ever want to give her a gift, those are out for sure.She currently lives with her own romance hero husband and two boys in Melbourne, Australia.


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